An Audience With Loretta Brocoletti And Friends

Once, a young runaway from Milan, with dreams of meeting The Rolling Stones, Loretta Brocoletti has blossomed into a world class act of dynamic proportions.
We are honoured and delighted to announce that Loretta has agreed to be our compare at this years Kirkinch Festival Of The Arts, notwithstanding her very heavy schedule and recent hip operation.
Sources close to the star have said that she is really looking forward to the event and plans to let her hair down with Colin Firth if we can get a lake built in time.
For those of you who are not familiar with The BBC's adaptation of Pride and Prejudice it was when Darcy/Colin Firth came out of a lake dripping wet that Lizzie Bennet and half the female poplulation suddenly noticed that Colin Firth could be quite sexy.
He hasn't cut it since, in my view, and the plastic surgery hasn't helped.

The Not So Famous James Brown

James Brown, seen here, dozing off during a photo shoot for "poetry Scotland, will be joining us at The Kirkinch Festival Of The Arts on July the 1st.
His poetic repertoire includes interesting and humorous observations on such varied topics as the political scene and the dress sense of elderly men.
As he likes to get to bed early we may have to include his contribution during The Craft and Book Fair which will be taking place during the afternoon.

James Brown was born in Fife. He is a regular contributer to "Poetry Scotland" and The BBC's "writing Room." He is also a devoted grandfather and not a bad cook.

Kirkinch Festival O The Airts 2007

I was watching The Graham Norton show last night, the uncut version and I suddenly thought, "why not invite him to our wonderful Festival?"

So I did.

I even mentioned possible accomodation at The Lands Of Loyal Hotel quite forgetting about the historic Drumkelbo which is less than a mile away. Apparently they would even send their Bentley to pick him up from the airport or anywhere else he needed picking up from. Presumably that would also include nipping down to Kirkinch to pick him up after the Festival.

Realizing that we do have very good facilities close at hand made me wonder if we should invite some more celebs.

Of course with all the talent we have here on our own doorstep they could find themselves a bit surplus to requirements and in Graham Norton's case we might have to increase the booze budget.